Feeding the Baby

I know this guy who was once mistreated by some people. This mistreatment was never addressed and he continued to harbor a grudge against them. Any sign that they had "feet of clay" caused him to rejoice. Any good that befell them caused him to grumble and complain. He never missed an opportunity to cause them difficulty or discomfort. He always let others know how much he didn't like them. And that kind of hate  is a  twisted   knife turning in your hand dangerous to hold dangerous to use I was talking to a man about the way I feel when I am angry. Sometimes I feel like I am riding a huge wave. I feel righteous and I find an angry eloquence that decimates my enemies. I am so hugely angry that I can't control or stop myself. It frightens me, and at the same time thrills me. People used to come to my office to listen to me on the phone with vendors who didn't deliver what they promised. The thing what frightened me was how much I enjoyed that feeling an...

Speaking of which, I know a really good poet, she taught a workshop here at our old money university. Her thoughts on poetry and life were energizing. Yeah, what the world needs is more poetry. Here is one of her poems Save Me Joe Louis When I was small no one stopped the fights. A man could beat you till you died, the crowd leaning in, you on your knees, maybe somewhere someone says,  No , but it's like spoons dropping in kitchens: enough to make someone look up, not enough to get them moving. The ref's just glad it isn't him trying to stand, shading his face like he's coming out of the movies into winter sun, shock of the world made real again — brutal, to be sure, but America is like that, unrelenting, you get what you ask for in the ring or on the kitchen floor. Someone always wants you to give up, shake hands, wipe the blood away and talk of lighter things. And you do because you've been fighting long enough to know there's no one...

Somewhere behind the hard place Unmapped, unseen a green Sigh of the orchard's blossoms opening in joy.  -- Posted by dovie devine to  Feeding the  Baby  at 4/19/2006 07:12:00 AM

I had a fantastic dream last night. After much travail the boys and I came home to a new village. I stopped my worn out station wagon in a park near a stone bridge that went over a shady creek. The passenger in my car was a wonderful woman and we were talking, very deeply engaged when we saw a man standing by the creek. He waved and she stood up and went to him. I blushed because I thought he was waving to me and that maybe I loved him, but she was his wife and it was all o.k. I turned around and there was a small sturdy woman in greasy coveralls. She had straight dark hair and brown eyes and a face that was plain and radiant with spirit. She was tan, her nose was straight and her mouth was thin, but her eyes were wide open and really looking at me.  She seemed wise and calm. She said that she had fixed my car. There had been a  red  patch on the electrical system put in by some chain garage that was an inadequate even dangerous repair, but she had seen it and fixed...

So the dream was about me wandering home to this encampment outdoors in a forest where I was trying to find a place to sleep. There were these funny beds, kind of like gurneys, with high sides and weird sheets.  I was helping another woman get a man settled into a bed. She was saying about how whatever you do will come back to you, and I said, "like if I find a dollar and keep it later someone will steal one from me, but if I give it back then I will get one back?"  She says, "yes like that," like karma.  Then we were bundling this guy up into a snug bed that pulls up like rubber and covers him all around then into the slot he goes. "How long is the trip?" I ask the lady and she says, "9 months."  I woke up and I thought, "strange dream", then I thought, "oh yeah! being born". Like I was helping out taking the dead souls and putting them back into bodies for  birth . 

My dream was watery. By Markus Bernet - Own work, CC BY-SA 2.0, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=57367  First I was at a hotel trying to take a shower in a common shower room and it was so crowded I gave up.  Then I went to the hotel desk and asked for the key to my room. They didn't even ask my name! Just handed it over and I went upstairs. As I walked down the corridor I came upon a little stand selling tea and bagels and I really wanted some but they looked too plastic. So I walked on and saw more and more little stands but they were full of junk food and ice cream. Finally I found a stand selling popcorn and I thought i could buy some to take back to the room for dennis. The pop corn guy listened to my request and immediately started a patter to up sell me. He kept showing me different shaped containers and saying for only a few dollars more my popcorn could come in one of these. When I pointed out that the containers looked different ...

Last night I dreamed that I went to a movie at the Fox Theatre in Riverside. An usher came to us during the movie and whispered that I had an urgent phone call in the lobby. She was carrying a bouquet of balloons with my name on it. Black and purple.  I went to the lobby and a girl handed me a telegram form. That was also black and purple and carbon copy like.  I read it and it was from someone who attended the Center for Turbulence Research summer program. They wanted me to urgently stop what I was doing and help them get registered. I looked for the date and found it was from 1992. They held the telegram until I next visited the theatre.